I need help! My husband of seven years has moved in his best friend into our place without setting a deadline for when this man will move out, and we do not have any children. This man has lost his job and his wife due to some terrible decisions he made. My husband has been feeling sorry for this man, and asked me if he could move in with us until he gets back on his feet. I had a no problem with this at first, but his staying with us has been nearly a year now, and my patience level is gone!
My husband has not been pressuring this man to pay rent, nor contribute to household expenses. This man does not have the desire to take care of his responsibilities, but walks around the house looking depressed, and my husband feeling sorry for him each time, and show so much compassion and patient to this man. My husband becomes defensive each time I questioned him on the length of this man's stay. This man gets jealous each time we invite close friends into our home for dinner, watch movies, etc, and he follows my husband around very close as though he is his MAN even out in public places! I feel like that I have another woman staying with us who has been competing for my husband's attention, and this is getting on my last NERVES!!
I told my husband that we need to seek counseling on how to deal with this man, but my husband has been refusing to discuss this with anyone because he knows that others will not take his side on this issue. My husband contributes this man sad countenance as having low self-esteem and no one cares for him, but I told my husband that this man is acting like this on purpose, because he does not want to leave our home, and he CHOOSES to avoid taking care of his responsibilities. His problems have become a part of our lives, and I want this man to leave our home! My husband spends more time with this man being his little helper to cut the grass, wash dishes etc, while I behaving more like a mother. Each night, I go to bed with a broken heart, feeling depressed...I have no desire to cook anymore, and take part of household responsibilities. On top of this, my husband is not affectionate toward me at all. I do not want a DIVORCE, but advices on how to deal with this situation.