Take her to the doctor for the pill. Have them administer a full panel of STD tests, pregnancy test, give her a pap, and give her information about what it means to be a teen having sex, STD's, Pregnancy, etc. IT'S really uncomfortable for GROWN women to do these things, and it's a BIG pinch of...
Best answer: Take her to the doctor for the pill. Have them administer a full panel of STD tests, pregnancy test, give her a pap, and give her information about what it means to be a teen having sex, STD's, Pregnancy, etc. IT'S really uncomfortable for GROWN women to do these things, and it's a BIG pinch of reality for a teen--real consequences & discomfort, worries about pregnancy etc. Nobody wants a speculum, those awful stirrups, for starters, or the wonders of peeing into a cup.
If she wants to play grownup, she needs to be protected. Your being steady right now, and showing her what REAL responsibility is (taking her to the doctor) as well as what the rest of the world thinks about these things is going to have a greater impact than yelling at her. Your silent disappointment (if you've had a good relationship) is more powerful than screaming. The rest of what you've done sounds great. Take her to the store and make her buy her own pregnancy tests at the cashier's. See how she likes that! Doctors and nurses are going to be objective but not encouraging if you have somebody you trust to do this whole procedure. They see too much to be all happy about this--and they won't be judgmental possibly, but if they see how you feel about this, they're going to be careful and clinical about all of this--which is anything but the impulsive sex act she chose. They'll also have her fill out a questionnaire about her sexual history, etc. Let her fill that out herself. It's not heartwarming to do.
This is definitely a part of growing up, but sneaking out is not okay--and speaks to what she knows was a premature stupid choice. She knows her future and your future freedom could be ruined--and probably knows that abortion or a child who is adopted and feeling unwanted all his/her life could be a sacrifice to her behavior. Condoms break. People who adopt out or get abortions suffer emotionally, and keeping children at her age is punishing as well to the child and to her and you. She may feel this is all part of the fun youth she's entitled to, but the idea of being a teen or young mom will NEVER make life fun.
Finally, you two need to have a frank and loving/respectful conversation about what it means to have a baby when the time is right, why it's best to make it a special and secure time in her life next time, etc. She needs to preserve her reputation but more importantly her sense of dignity (which doesn't last if you start going around too much too easily at any age). You need to explain to her why she can't run off and what a horror that is to you to not know where she is or whether you're safe, can't protect her from who knows what, etc. She needs to test out what this kid she was with really is about--how much does he handle when it comes to no more sex. That can be a big lesson learned.
Taking her to a counselor if she is always defiant is also something you may need to consider however.
Keeping that phone away is critical but as long as this kid is in her life (or any boy that you know of) she'll not have her keys either, I think?