• If you're old, can you give me some life-related advice? (Read full).?

    See, i know this is going to sound rude so if you're easily offended just don't read, duhh. I am 20 & a Black woman. I do my best to look good.. You do get the idea. I try to look my best. Thankfully I'm not bad-looking so i do get asked out too When i was growing up, i always noticed how... show more
    See, i know this is going to sound rude so if you're easily offended just don't read, duhh. I am 20 & a Black woman. I do my best to look good.. You do get the idea. I try to look my best. Thankfully I'm not bad-looking so i do get asked out too When i was growing up, i always noticed how practically all men, esp. non-white ones, LUSTED after White women. My own brother, and my dad (though he's still married to my Black mom), too. It was hurtful. My brother is 12 years older than me. He used to EXCLUSIVELY date White women. My dad would visibly lust after those women. And all other men too. So growing up, i decided I'll ONLY date White men, because i know how ,on the inside, most of these men (including my brother who is HIGHLY successful) will reject the best of Black girls for her colour. I'd rather not be someone's compromise or second choice. I'll date only White guys so that i can be assured they find me attractive for having Black skin, or finding me exotic..instead of because they "couldn't land a White girl". I am trying to make myself prettier and I'm in University, now. I date only White men. I have straight hair, I'm thin, i speak properly and do my best in studies because i want to be rich and be able to live happy, and get revenge on those who made me feel less because I'm a Black woman. Do you have any advice for me (only answer if you're older than at least 35-40)? How do i become a successful, rich, pretty Black girl who can attract White guys easily?
    44 answers · Family · 21 hours ago
  • My dad wont give me back my ipod back?

    30 answers · Family · 17 hours ago
  • I wanna get rid of my girlfriend but she said she will kill herself if I leave her?

    Best answer: She is NOT a good match for you. She has a lot of really negative behaviors that NO ONE should tolerate in a partner (or even just a friend). Calling 39 times is obsessive and ridiculous. You simply did not have your charger with you - there is nothing wrong with that. We can't always charge our phones whenever... show more
    Best answer: She is NOT a good match for you. She has a lot of really negative behaviors that NO ONE should tolerate in a partner (or even just a friend). Calling 39 times is obsessive and ridiculous. You simply did not have your charger with you - there is nothing wrong with that. We can't always charge our phones whenever we want/need to unfortunately. Aggressive behavior is also negative and can turn physically violent. She sounds like the obsessive stalker type and THOSE are the types you run far away from.

    If she is threatening to harm herself, it is very likely a guilt-trip/manipulation method to try to "force" you to stay with her. She thinks if she makes massive threats like this, you'll stay with her just to keep her from hurting herself. Don't let that happen to you. Sit down and have an honest talk with her. Let her know that her behavior is absolutely unacceptable and you can't tolerate it any longer. Tell her you don't think she's the person you first thought she was. Let her know that hurting herself will not solve ANYTHING and encourage her to get help for her behavioral issues.

    To avoid issues after you call it off you can change your phone number (and ask others NOT to give her your new one), remove/block her on all social media, keep an eye out in public (don't stay holed up in your house, but try your best to avoid her if you happen to see her out somewhere), and make sure you collect any personal items of yours from her that could be an issue (like house/apartment or vehicle keys), and don't be afraid to consider adding some type of security system to your home. I would also warn any NEW dates you may get about her (often times, problematic exes will try to harass/stalk the new partner as well as their ex lover). If any form of harassment or stalking gets too out of hand, contact the local authorities. You definitely cannot stalk people. If they don't want to be with you, too bad. Stalking and harassment are very much so illegal.

    If you're concerned for her safety, call the authorities and explain the situation to them, then see if they'll go do a wellness check. Also, alert people closest to her (friends/family) and let them know what she's been doing and saying.
    33 answers · Singles & Dating · 1 day ago
  • I don’t know what to do with my son and how he treats me?

    My son is 19 and his gf is 16 and she pregnant with a boy. He told me when he found out that if I recommend circumcision he will send me to the ER and get a restraining order. He hates me for that and a few years ago he got some tugging device for it and I threw it out and he got MAD. Her (K) and her parents hate... show more
    My son is 19 and his gf is 16 and she pregnant with a boy. He told me when he found out that if I recommend circumcision he will send me to the ER and get a restraining order. He hates me for that and a few years ago he got some tugging device for it and I threw it out and he got MAD. Her (K) and her parents hate me. They were nice at first and then cause they love my son so much they hate me cause of probably what he told them. I also think he’s bisexual (his internet history when he was younger and the way he hung around other boys and girls too and he acted gay when he was little but doesn’t anymore). K is also racist (she’s Hispanic) and called me white trash. She said she’ll be the mother I can’t be. My son also hates that I didn’t tell him he had Asperger when he was little and told his sister and talked to her about some of his issues before even him and claims I favor her (it’s not that he was just always harder to love) he also threatened to shoot my husband if he came near his gf or son. Also they live in a little apartment in a ghetto part of Pennsylvania I don’t wanna say where but near philly and he got mad when I said it wasn’t safe to raise a kid there. He also hates my dead dad and spread lies about what a bad man and child beater he was. (After he died he could not be bothered with anything about him) and didn’t cry at all. My son also smokes pot at least once a week and drinks. He implies I’m stupid all the time how stupid I am and I can’t take it?
    13 answers · Family · 14 hours ago
  • I was molested by another girl?

    Me and my this girl used to have sleepovers when we were both little and i remember i woke up onetime in my bed touching me i asked what she was doing and she said nothing and kept going i told her to stop but she kept talking about how it'll help me and stuff, another time i went to her house and she did it... show more
    Me and my this girl used to have sleepovers when we were both little and i remember i woke up onetime in my bed touching me i asked what she was doing and she said nothing and kept going i told her to stop but she kept talking about how it'll help me and stuff, another time i went to her house and she did it again. she kept taking advantage of me because she was older telling me things making me think it was fine and everything it wasn't until months back i realized what it was and ever since then i just feel so dirty and gross i don't know how to deal with this because i don't want to tell anyone because im scared they'll look at me different. i mean i told my only friend what happened but she didn't really help me at all and it didnt seem as she'd care. i'm losing my mind over this i can't stop thinking about it and i don't know what to do. Please...help!
    19 answers · Friends · 2 days ago
  • Would you keep a man who has this 'baggage'?

    I'm the so-called "a trust-fund baby", financially secure but not rich (don't envy me; I got it because my mom died in an accident). Meaning I can rent (not buy) a flat in a good neighborhood and have a holiday once a year (nothing fancy, tho'). I have a job as an administration staff as... show more
    I'm the so-called "a trust-fund baby", financially secure but not rich (don't envy me; I got it because my mom died in an accident). Meaning I can rent (not buy) a flat in a good neighborhood and have a holiday once a year (nothing fancy, tho'). I have a job as an administration staff as well. Now I'm in a pretty serious relationship with a researcher. As he's working in a university instead of in industry, he's not rich either. I don't mind that. The problem is this: He's half-Japanese, and his widowed mother lives in Japan (no possibility of her coming here). He has recently told me that he has to fully support her, because she has done everything to ensure him a good education in the West, and now she doesn't have enough saving to keep her tiny home unless he helps her. He told me so that I can decide if I want to continue our relationship despite this, as this means that I have to "share" with his mother. I don't want to sound shallow, but this has rather taken me aback. He's a kind and steady man who has promised to prioritize me, but - because he doesn't want to let his mother to lack anything either - this means that we're not going to be as comfortable as I've imagined. Without this problem, we would be able to buy a house and have no worries about bills. He has an elder brother who doesn't want to divide the burden, but he has this sense-of-duty that makes me rather worried for the future. Were you in my position, would you take this man despite his 'baggage'?
    22 answers · Marriage & Divorce · 2 days ago
  • Would you ever cheat on someone?

    Best answer: No. Because I wouldn't want to be cheated on myself.
    Best answer: No. Because I wouldn't want to be cheated on myself.
    99 answers · Singles & Dating · 4 days ago
  • Can a guy think of a girl alot and not text/call her?

    What are the reasons
    What are the reasons
    58 answers · Singles & Dating · 4 days ago
  • Would you kick out your nephew?

    Best answer: Like they say, the road to hell is paved with good intentions. I'm curious about what was said to him when you let him in. Did you write this out as a contract with a final deadline date or was this just a friendly chat? I have a horrible feeling it was more like the latter!. Also, is there any stipulation... show more
    Best answer: Like they say, the road to hell is paved with good intentions. I'm curious about what was said to him when you let him in. Did you write this out as a contract with a final deadline date or was this just a friendly chat? I have a horrible feeling it was more like the latter!. Also, is there any stipulation about jobs and contributing to family income? Finally, whose family "side" does he come from?

    I ask because what happens next is mainly the responsibility of the spouse whose relative he is. The biggest risk here is to your marriage, so if this is your relative, your wife is going to start resenting you for this mess. If it's her, you'll start resenting. So one of you owes it to the other to come down much harder on this nephew, including kicking him out.

    People are telling you to kick him out, but it's not as easy as it sounds. If he refuses to go, in most states this involves a court hearing (this all started as a way to protect tenants rights).

    You have 2 choices. If you want to give him one last chance, you've got to step up your game. Write up a contract with specific dates, like he needs to be employed w/in 5 days. He needs to give X percent of his income to you. He's to help with chores around the house, including his laundry. Get him to agree and sign this.

    If he gives you lip, or you're at the point where you're past this, then try kicking him out. If he refuses to leave, then you have to make it much more difficult for him to live there. This will be unpleasant for both of you, but you're out of options. Find a way to not give him access to your food, even if it means putting a lock on the refrig. Obviously, stop cooking for him. Dinner is for the 2 of you, and if he gets obnoxious or tries taking it anyway, call the cops. He's stealing from you.

    If he has a key to your place, try to snag it where he keeps it (it's not stealing, because it's your property). If this doesn't work, change the locks and don't give him a new key. Tell him you'll let him back in until 8 pm and after that you won't. If he stands at the front door yelling, call the cops.

    I know all this sounds extreme, but don't forget, he thinks of you and your wife as easy marks and he's taking advantage of you. You can "love" him as a relative but hate him as a person, and this is where you need to be.
    21 answers · Family · 1 day ago
  • Ex gf says “go with with the flow” to me. Is she just being friendly or might reconsider getting back together?

    Basically me and my ex decided to be friends. (Long distance)I haven’t talked to her much cause I wanted to give her space after the break for the both of us. So I’m actually suppose to see her in August for two weeks. I just told her out of the blue if we should just talk when she gets back from her study abroad... show more
    Basically me and my ex decided to be friends. (Long distance)I haven’t talked to her much cause I wanted to give her space after the break for the both of us. So I’m actually suppose to see her in August for two weeks. I just told her out of the blue if we should just talk when she gets back from her study abroad trip and if she feels comfortable sharing a bed when I see her. She said these two things 1) about the bed situation “We’re visiting a refugee site?? we’re all confused as to what it is exactly but that’s what we’ve been told lol and it’ll be fine. if it does get weird i’ll sleep with (her friend) or on the floor idc. just don’t worry about it. 2)about the texting her “it‘s fine to text while i’m here. we don’t have to wait or save stuff to talk about once i’m finally home. that’s too much. stop overthinking things, just go with the flow and not worry too much” Is she showing somewhat of an interest or just playing it cool as friends?
    33 answers · Singles & Dating · 2 days ago
  • My mum wants to kick me out and have another baby Because she dont get any money from CSA anymore?

    Im 17 and my mum wants to kick me out as she no longer gets money from CSA?shes planning on having another baby so she gets the money back! However i want to live with my friend but my mum said she will get the police involved. Shes kicking me out so surely she cant do that!
    Im 17 and my mum wants to kick me out as she no longer gets money from CSA?shes planning on having another baby so she gets the money back! However i want to live with my friend but my mum said she will get the police involved. Shes kicking me out so surely she cant do that!
    6 answers · Family · 15 hours ago
  • What are insufffiecnment funds?

    Best answer: It means that you do not have the money or do not have the entire amount of money that you are trying to spend on a debit or credit card.
    Best answer: It means that you do not have the money or do not have the entire amount of money that you are trying to spend on a debit or credit card.
    6 answers · Family · 15 hours ago
  • Should I tell my ex’s wife he cheated on her?

    I'd been in a secret relationship with my boss for for 6 months. I'm 24, he's 46. I wanted to be with him properly and he said he was going to leave his wife but after he kept making excuses about it not being the right time for her and his kids etc I told him either he told her or I will. Then he... show more
    I'd been in a secret relationship with my boss for for 6 months. I'm 24, he's 46. I wanted to be with him properly and he said he was going to leave his wife but after he kept making excuses about it not being the right time for her and his kids etc I told him either he told her or I will. Then he decided not to leave his wife and he's fired me from my job citing poor performance. Should I tell his wife what's been going on? My worry is she won't believe me and she'll just think I'm bitter about being fired.
    22 answers · Marriage & Divorce · 2 days ago
  • I dislike my mom?

    I am 15 (a girl if that matters), and right now I am just really angry at my mom. She always tells people I am feeling upset or mad about things I am fine with just because she disagrees with them, she forces me into situations to "help me" when in reality they don't help at all, she assumes I have... show more
    I am 15 (a girl if that matters), and right now I am just really angry at my mom. She always tells people I am feeling upset or mad about things I am fine with just because she disagrees with them, she forces me into situations to "help me" when in reality they don't help at all, she assumes I have depression when I don't just because I sleep in and like to stay in my room (I have three brothers, it is a mad house out there, no way am I going to other rooms of the house), and when I try to tell her I don't and try to reason with her, she continues thinking I do anyways and tells family members and friends. How do I reason with her? I am beginning to think she doesn't even care how I feel, I mean, I used to think she was just looking out for me but it has gone way too far past that point. Recently, we had planned for me to meet up with some of my friends who live two hours away (I can't drive there on my own since I don't have a license, and they were coming into town anyways so them and their mom were gonna take me on their way back) , she got the dates wrong and I ended up not being able to go (I was okay with it) and instead of recognizing that there was just some miscommunication, she got mad at their mom and started talking about how it hurt my feelings that I wasn't able to go and that they told her the wrong dates (they were the right dates). How do I handle her? Every time I try to talk to her about things like this she gets mad.
    5 answers · Family · 15 hours ago
  • Is my friend a lot older than me?

    Her birthday is October 28, 1999 and my birthday is February 11, 2000. She always tries to make me sound like a little baby just because I was born in the 2000s and she was born in the 90s, I mean she’s only months older so it’s starting to bother me how she’s always all like “hey little baby” and she says things... show more
    Her birthday is October 28, 1999 and my birthday is February 11, 2000. She always tries to make me sound like a little baby just because I was born in the 2000s and she was born in the 90s, I mean she’s only months older so it’s starting to bother me how she’s always all like “hey little baby” and she says things like “haha you didn’t experience the 90s” and it really bothers me. It got me thinking, is she really a lot older than me and would that make her a century older than me like she says?
    15 answers · Friends · 22 hours ago
  • How do you know when you have found the one?

    Best answer: If you listen only to your heart - you may get burned like billions of people in the past, including me, did. It takes mutual true love, lots of things in common, and both people being strong people for a relationship to last a lifetime. Here's some information about love from the books True Love Lasts,... show more
    Best answer: If you listen only to your heart - you may get burned like billions of people in the past, including me, did.

    It takes mutual true love, lots of things in common, and both people being strong people for a relationship to last a lifetime.

    Here's some information about love from the books True Love Lasts, Straight Talk About Teen Dating, and Straight Talk About Dating:

    “Unfortunately, lots of people don’t know what true love is and that’s a big reason why a large number of marriage relationships are unhappy. Many people think that true love is just a feeling. You know, the wonderful head spinning feeling of being “in love.”

    If true love is just a feeling, feelings come and go. But true love doesn't come and go. True love is patient and kind. It isn’t jealous, rude, selfish, controlling, or easily angered. It forgives. It’s supportive, loyal, hopeful, and trusting.

    Unlike the feeling of being “in love” which is relatively easy to get especially during dating, true love usually develops slowly over a significant period of time (often years). True love is so much more than just the feeling of being “in love” - it’s supposed to be a mutual lifelong commitment. When you say that you love your significant other, you’re saying that you’re committed to loving them for the rest of your life - for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, from this day forward, until death do you part. True love lasts - it almost never fails.

    Think of it this way, if a person has true love for another person, it’s like the sun - it’s always there no matter what (remember that even at night, the sun is still there, it’s just shining on the other side of the earth - and when it’s cloudy outside the sun is also still there, it’s just behind the clouds).

    On the other hand, the feeling of being “in love” is like sunshine - even though we’d like it to be sunny every day, the truth is that the amount of sunshine changes regularly. Some days it’s nice and sunny and the feeling of being “in love” is strong, on others it’s partly cloudy and the feeling of being “in love” is there but it’s not very strong, and on other days it’s cloudy and the feeling of being “in love” is barely there at all. I’m hoping that this explanation is helping you to see that it’s possible for a person to have true love for another person and not have a strong intense feeling of being “in love” with that person at a particular moment. (If you talk with married couples, I think they’ll tell you that the strength of their feelings of being “in love” changes regularly.)

    So when you hear someone say, “I don't love him or her anymore” - take it for what it usually is. It’s usually someone saying that they’ve lost the feeling of being “in love”, that they don’t know how or they’re not willing to make the effort required to get the feeling back, and that they probably never had true love for their significant other to begin with because true love almost never fails.

    Many times I’ve heard young women say, “my boyfriend loves me.” Unfortunately, most of these women have been fooled. How could their boyfriend possibly have true love for them if their boyfriend doesn’t even know what true love is? Sadly many people marry when one or both people don't have true love for the other - and the result is usually divorce because it's hard to keep a marriage together when it's based only on the feeling of being "in love."

    My first suggestion is that you put in the effort necessary to become a strong person (if you’re not already). A strong person has good character (honesty, integrity, trustworthiness), a positive attitude (cheerful, caring, friendly, forgiving, helpful, and respectful), fulfills their responsibilities (for handling pains in a positive way, for always trying to make a good choice, for taking care of themselves, for serving others), puts forth their best effort, and displays self-control (of their body, anger, tongue and money).

    My second suggestion is that you eventually look for this type of person (otherwise you are setting yourself up for a broken heart). Unfortunately this type of person is difficult to find – but save yourself the heartache and don’t settle for less.

    (Please remember that you eventually want a 50 or 60 year marriage - not a 5 or 10 year marriage.)

    Hope this helps!
    10 answers · Singles & Dating · 2 days ago
  • Is lusting over your child sexual abuse?

    Best answer: He's already been sexually abusing you for years with grossly inappropriate touching. You can get him stopped and get help for yourself by telling a teacher, a nurse, a doctor, a police officer, call 911, call Child Protective Services, tell them what's been happening to you. Don't bother telling your... show more
    Best answer: He's already been sexually abusing you for years with grossly inappropriate touching. You can get him stopped and get help for yourself by telling a teacher, a nurse, a doctor, a police officer, call 911, call Child Protective Services, tell them what's been happening to you.
    Don't bother telling your mother. Chances are she's well aware of what her husband's been doing to you and either doesn't care to stop it or blames you (you are NOT at fault). He is NOT being playful --- he is a sexual predator. I've seen many mothers abandon their kids like this. Get help and get out of there as soon as possible.
    24 answers · Family · 3 days ago
  • Losing Virginity/Girl?

    Best answer: here is your problem "I was wet but he got super excited and stuck it in early lmao" sex does not stretch out your vagina. but sufficient foreplay causes it to easily open to fit a penis. you may have been "comfortable" but you were no where near turned on enough for penetration. when you are... show more
    Best answer: here is your problem "I was wet but he got super excited and stuck it in early lmao"
    sex does not stretch out your vagina. but sufficient foreplay causes it to easily open to fit a penis. you may have been "comfortable" but you were no where near turned on enough for penetration. when you are aroused enough for sex the cervix moves up out of the way so that it is not getting punched at a mere 3 inches. you should be close to orgasm through foreplay before you allow him to "stick it in" being wet happens very early in arousal, that does not mean aroused enough for penetration
    40 answers · Singles & Dating · 4 days ago