Why don't people like me that much?
I don't have a misconstrued view of myself (although views are subjective) or self esteem issues or any type of medically diagnosed depression and I don't feel depressed-just slightly out-casted.
I'm 20 years old and a junior in college and I don't have any friends. I'm not ugly, I most definitely am cute with a hint of nerd-ish charm and a decent body since I love running and doing taichi.
I don't smell, I'm very aware and acknowledgeable about my hygiene and health. I'm a fairly intelligent guy, I get along with people fine, I'm not too outgoing but I'm not that shy either. I talk to people and I am a decent conversationalist, I know when and what manners are appropriate or not. I'm quite witty and enjoy using sarcasm, but I never use it in an offensive way and I know when to speak or not.
I'm not an annoying political activist, I have my views, but they're always in changing and progressing as I feel they should be at this age so I don't bother people with my opinions.
I feel I'm a pretty open guy and approachable at the very least and I'm extremely nice, I will always go out of my way to help others and do it at any given chance and I'm not stuck up about it or expect anything in return.
But even then, people don't really talk to me, it's a good week if 2 or 3 people attempt any form of communication with me. I don't get invited to do anything, even study groups where all my classmates attend, even when I have often helped multiple members of my classes in different classes.
I don't have any close friends and when I try to talk to people they don't seem very interested or want to converse with me and tend to cut the conversation short.
Has anyone else been this situation or know of someone who can help shed some light on this? It's been this way all my life and I'm not known for anything embarrassing that people would avoid me for. I'm essentially just not there for the most part.
I can provide examples if asked for to gain a better understanding.
And it's not specifically that I care what they think, I would like some insight into their thought process though and mainly "why" people tend not to associate with that much.
I'm not touchy at all in social situations. I would find that rather awkward to be that way and I am very careful on trying to pick up on other people's signals on invading their personal space or not.
Of course I don't always know if I am or not, but I definitely make a conscious effort to not do so, so I don't believe that is the problem as well. I'm quite stuck in rut here on understanding this.
Another note, as for the mention about my body language, I'm very laid back for the most part.
Again, it's not what people think "per say," it's about understanding "why."
And to say, don't worry about what others think is rather pointless because all people need some sort of satisfaction from their peers and acceptance which I don't generally have.
Check out the last post I had about this, it's still up. It might give you some insight into better responses:
Thank you for your time and post if you put some quality effort into responding.
The Original- It's a question, people have those.
Savannah- Again, as communicated to Dick, not an "emo" post, I'm definitely not crying over it as you are insinuating, it's a question. And as a side note, it seems like you have the intelligence of your dog.
Oswald- I don't try much at all. I keep up my appearance , but I don't over do it. And if people need help, I would never be condescending like the posters above. If some one needs help, they need help, if you have the ability to help, do so. And I'm not exactly sure what arrogant attire is, my average dress is an argyle sweater with jeans and brown loafers.