Imagine you are a billionaire and you build yourself a big beautiful mansion.. you live there awhile and are sort of lonely, so you decide to invite others to come and live with you.. but who to invite? It's your home and you want it to be a nice place for yourself and everyone - so that rules out murderers, thieves, pedophiles, liars etc.. so, what you do is say to people "hey, you can come and live with me, but there are gonna be some rules for the benefit of us all.. you will have to obey me and follow these rules, so we can all live together in a great place - if you don't want to obey me, you can't live with me."
Personally, I think this is totally FAIR.. God doesn't send anyone to hell - he has clearly invited us to heaven! He's also warned us that if we don't want to be loving and kind, that we are going to be going to a rather nasty place - where people like that live.. again, it isn't that we don't know, or that he hid this from us - he invites us to live with him in paradise, that is what he wants, but how can it be heaven, unless we are loving and kind? - he tells us the alternative, and then we get to choose.. he can't save those who refuse to be good to others, or it wouldn't be heaven.. he can't save selfish horrible people, and just make them 'good' because that would take away our right to choose..
psalm 81 “If my people would only listen to me, if Israel would only follow my ways, how quickly I would subdue their enemies
and turn my hand against their foes! Those who hate the Lord would cringe before him, and their punishment would last forever. But you would be fed with the finest of wheat; with honey from the rock I would satisfy you.”
In other words, listen to how God pleads with us to listen to him, for our own good - and look what he offers - freedom from fear, no punishment, the best of everything (not all of it in this lifetime though).. By acknowledging that God is Master - he created us and knows better than us what is good, and doing what he commands, we become his dearly loved children forever - that is what he holds out to us.. He loves us, and will forgive us whatever we have done, but we must obey him, in order to live with him (be saved)